Adults are just obsolete children and the hell with them.

Sorry about that little essay the other day, I have really not been in the mood to write about my life plus I figured most of you are sick of hearing my “I’m so sick, cry me a fucking river” tune! So I gave you a break but guess what?! Here comes my “I’m so sick cry me a fucking river” tune all over again!

I had my crazywordIcannotsay operationthingie and the doctors didn’t end up finding what they thought I had, which I am kind of glad about because YAY no bacteria in my tummy! But also Nay, because now there is no sure-fire fix for it

Ends up I have a loose sphincter. I spent the first week after I found out telling everyone that asked how it went that I had a loose sphincter. People kept looking at me all funny and walking away slowly, other then one guy that was suddenly acting like I was the coolest chick in the world. Then I told my sister (Ms. Nurse-Doctor-Lawyer) that I had a loose sphincter and she laughed at me:

Me: “What is so funny??”
Ms. NDL: “Tell me you are talking about the one in your stomach”
Me: “Yes, what else would I be talking about?! Duh!” Realisation Dawns….. “Oh crap! I didn’t realise that was called the same thing!!

So just for clarification, I do have a loose sphincter but this one connects my oesophagus to my stomach, there is no other one. End of story!

Well not really end of story because I have more to tell you!

I have now changed my whole diet. I am the girl that has no tastebuds so I pile every meal full of flavour. So basically everything I cook you can be sure that there will either garlic, onion, chilli or curry in it and usually a mixture of all. Now I can’t have any of these. Alcohol is a no no too but that's OK because my body seems to be rejecting it at the moment so that's no biggie. And chocolate is meant to be out but I laugh in the face of anyone that tries to take away my chocolate! Laugh and then cut them… evil little fuckers. Who do they think they are taking my god damned chocolate!?!

I am also on tablets for the next 4 months. Once that is up I go back and see how it is all going and if its gone then no more tablets YAY but if not I am back on them for another 4 months. Rinse and repeat… well swallow and repeat really…

Sadly the new diet thing is something that I have to stick to long term. Once it all settles down I will be able to slowly introduce them all back into my diet but definitely not in the excess as I have had in the past. That makes me cry. Luckily chocolate fixes the crying.

But on the plus with the exception of the weekend and when I am lying down I have only had baaaaaaad indigestion around 5 times this week which is heaven for me!!!

Oh just a quick note that I am going away on holidays as of next Friday so I will try to get a few extra posts in before then because there will be no updating for a full week, omg I think I’m going to pass out just thinking about it! We are going out to the middle of bumfuck (also known as “loose sphincter”) nowhere on a Road Trip! So I will have a bazillion photos when I get back

Here is a funny little convo that I had with boy about my Flickr a few days ago as well, enjoy!

Me: “Woo, I got another photo explored!”
Boy: “What is it of? My bum?”
Me: “No! As if!”
Boy: “Why not! My bum would so get explored!” Realisation dawns… “Holy crap! No it wouldn’t No it wouldn’t!

(Boy would like a disclaimer here… he does NOT have a loose sphincter!)